The Soul Searcher
My sobriety had given me new vision.
I no longer live inside a self-destructive vicious cycle. I can now freely utilize my brain, feel the blood pumping in my every vein, think straight, become receptive and unhurried. And most of all, I start to reflect on my life. Hence this year, a year of reflection.
Art, and true art by all means, is the manifestation of one’s soul. There is no art, no music, no drama without human beings. All expressive art form derives from human alone. These are the things I have been reminded since I started my Master of Expressive Arts Therapy in HKU this September. My body, mind & spirit transformed its way into an unfamiliar yet comfortable plateau… while absorbing newfound concepts and ideas, I went back to my roots, and started digging what I have created in the past; and like a film roller replaying an old flick, I, as the audience saw everything revealed itself in a sequence of thoughts arising from darkness to light; from hatred to forgiveness; from pain to joy.
It all makes sense now.
Art, music, writing, singing…they are no longer separate entities to me, but unified as one. Instead of only displaying my paintings in an exhibition, or performing a gig at another venue, I present them together as a whole. Audience are no longer strangers sitting across me, watching. They come together with my art, my music, our lives connected, hearts and souls identified.
My self-produced album The Inferno was performed as a show at ACO Sound-on-site. It was by far the most successful show. Success does not mean the amount of people who came to the show, but the amount of people whom I touched. I transformed myself and the venue into a dark forest and shared my music, my art, my most intimate thoughts and dark secrets with the audience. Like a door bursted open, audience left me messages about their dark secrets too. It is as if we all went into The Inferno together, and when the performance ended, we each went out of the dark forest with a huge weight lifted.
Personal interaction, touch, a warm hug, a pat on the shoulder, a smile from the heart, unpremeditated sharing, genuine love, acts of kindness…these are all the most innate human empathetic emotions. Emotions that connect us.
The power of Art is in the way it can enliven our spirits and touch us in unimaginable ways. Art is the way we touch, the way we love and care for others in need. Art is how we treat nature, children, animals, the weak, the unnoticeable, the unwanted. Art is not selfish, it is not boastful nor judgmental. Art is not vanity. Art is how we live our lives, from the moment we wake up, till the moment we close our eyes. True Art is Soul. Without soul, art becomes superficial. What an artist create, comes from the depth. Depth is sufferings of the soul. Depth is painful. Depth is the intensity of how much the artist can face within him/herself. A true artist create not out of intellect, but desire. The desire to be free from all unwanted attachments, and reunite his/her true self through creations, to something higher than ourselves.
Art is the spiritual journey of life.
Hence this year, this particular year, I believe, finally, I am walking on the right path in life.